| (no subject) |
[Oct. 15th, 2009|02:53 pm] |
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I'm on a roll with my training. Woohoooo. April 25th!!!! |
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| (no subject) |
[Sep. 1st, 2009|01:46 pm] |
We went to Six Flags yesterday and got caricature drawings. . . Favorite part of my day.
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| (no subject) |
[Dec. 28th, 2008|04:57 pm] |
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Yerba Maté (pronounced Yur-ba Mah-tay) was first introduced to civilizations centuries ago by the Guarani Indians, who specially brewed tea from the Yerba Maté tree native to the rain forests of South America. Considered “The Drink of the Gods,” Yerba Maté is one of the cleanest forms of energy on earth. It provides all the advantages of caffeine, naturally — without the jitters or drastic highs and lows. 24 life-sustaining vitamins and minerals, 15 amino acids that help make essential proteins, abundant antioxidants that build the body’s defenses, mental clarity and well-being, longevity and vitality. |
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| (no subject) |
[Dec. 19th, 2008|07:17 pm] |
Information is not knowledge. Knowledge is not wisdom. Wisdom is not truth. Truth is not beauty. Beauty is not love. Love is not music. Music is THE BEST...
-Frank Zappa |
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| hola |
[Jul. 25th, 2007|04:16 am] |
I dont have the energy lately to be expressive. Probably because I have so much to reveal but lately I think it's okay to maybe forget or rememeber it all again because of a dejavu or a dream similar to it. Life is fine.
I haven't felt sad over a month now. I'm not taking any anti-depressants or illegal drugs. This is my longest record.
....My horoscope today.....
....Sometimes the need to play detracts from professional progress and the achievement of long-range goals. Friendship with colleagues and especially superiors may be lacking, or prove to be a detriment to you in a roundabout way today. It seems you must choose either business or pleasure--work or play. These two arenas simply don't go together very well for you at present, so don't try to split your time between them. Choose one and go for it..... |
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| (no subject) |
[Jun. 15th, 2007|12:37 pm] |
my journal is so dirty.
i want to start hanging out with old friends, innocent people.
maybe start a garden.
and write all about it.
right. |
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| Spain |
[May. 26th, 2007|12:34 pm] |
He was born 13 years and 2 days before me. We are astrologically very much the same person. Hyper sensitive but then when we're happy, we're on top of the world. When he would come home with 4,000 euros, he had that same big annoying smile I use to carry from a goodnight at work. "Tati, do you want to go to Mallorca?!", "Tatiana, do you want to go Venice?", "In september, we could go to Morracos?", "Hey Tati, my friend who lives in Barcelona invited us to stay the weekend, what do you think?" We would never end up going anywhere. Instead we would drink and eat from one chic bar to another. By 3 in the morning, it was bedtime but not necessarily but I was always tired because this was not my lifestyle, or it was but I had left it a long time ago and I was not use to it. For 6 weeks, I was passive and submissive. Someone I always wished I was, because it meant guys liked you more.(I wished) to be liked or at least to be treated as if I were liked, for once. But it was Lexatin, a low dosage anti-depressant I started taking, that molded me to conform, to behave, to allow someone to take complete advantage of me. I say, I was taken complete advantage of but I consciously allowed it and I say "taken complete advantage of" because I tend to exxxagerate situations but I don't mean to give the impression that I was mistreated. Quite the contrary. We went shopping, we cooked for each other, we spent time with his family, we did everything that I dreamt of doing with a man. He was good to me. But he was not good to himself. And he wanted me to go along with him too that same road. Three packs of ciggerates, alot of hash and alot of whiskey. These were his version of my Lexatin.
Our last phone conversation:
"Tatiana, I rather be a goodlooking cadaveour than be old."
"But what about me, Jorge? What am I going to do without you?"
"You'll have to be my widow, but I have life insurance, you'll get alot of money."
"What's wrong with you?"
"You don't want to recognize you have problems."
"Tati, yes I am very aware I have problems, you have no idea how aware I am of them, I just don't have the desire to resolve them."
"What a shame."
"Well I can't be with you. I'm not going to pretend your life is normal anymore or follow your lifestyle."
"That´s fantastic. I know my lifestyle isn't yours. Well, Tati, it was nice being with you. I had alot of fun. I hope you have a beautiful, happy life."
Silence.
"Gracias."
Click.
Without this man, I could not see myself how people see me. I saw myself so much, so much through him. And what I saw was beautiful but primarily scary and sad. But there was only one difference, our age; 13 years and 2 days. And that's how I knew to let him go cause even though I´m depressed alot, I still have hope, I'm stil young even though I'm turning 21 in a month and I feel old, I still have hope. I still have desire to keep fighting, to live a few more dreams, to keeping going no matter what.
Now that I've said goodbye, I can't help but wonder how you're doing.
Jorge, mi amor...
Te quise.
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| (no subject) |
[Dec. 25th, 2006|02:09 pm] |
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im saddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddd |
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| hahaha i'm mildly schitzo |
[Nov. 4th, 2006|08:57 pm] |
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Many believe that schizotypal personality disorder represents mild schizophrenia. The disorder is characterized by odd forms of thinking and perceiving, and individuals with this disorder often seek isolation from others. They sometimes believe to have extra sensory ability or that unrelated events relate to them in some important way. They generally engage in eccentric behavior and have difficulty concentrating for long periods of time. Their speech is often over elaborate and difficult to follow. |
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| (no subject) |
[Nov. 2nd, 2006|02:07 pm] |
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They have paid to see ,there are eyes on me, ive been riding hard with the sun and starlets.. all alone ,believe me. Its better than the two of us. to give it all,this life is ours. all i wanna say is their reasoning is colorblind by the dream they had in yearning, AND IF THEY WANT YOU, then they can raise their eyes up into the sun....but you cant give what you dont have and have a reason too, forget the story. Say youre going to try, say your going to fly, say you'll do it fine, but the lights go brown, its a drowning crowd.and it's surfacing close to heaven. |
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| Joy division song, Love will tear us apart. |
[Nov. 1st, 2006|08:50 am] |
When the routine bites hard
and ambitions are low
And the resentment rides high
but emotions won't grow
And we're changing our ways,
taking different roads
Then love, love will tear us apart
again (4)
Why is the bedroom so cold
Turned away on your side?
Is my timing that flawed,
our respect run so dry?
Yet there's still this appeal
That we've kept through
our lives
Love, love will tear us apart again (4)
Do you cry out in your sleep
All my failings expose?
Get a taste in my mouth
As desperation takes hold
Is it something so good
Just can't function no more?
When love, love will tear us apart
again (4) |
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| (no subject) |
[Oct. 29th, 2006|04:27 pm] |
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can't we just spend a night fully clothed,ive already seen your hole,now iWANT TO SEE YOUR SOUL. |
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| song song song song |
[Oct. 28th, 2006|04:33 pm] |
There was a time a good girl believed
Things would turn out right
If you just behave and with God above
No one would ever know
I've had some broken dreams
I'd just as soon forget
Waiting for the finer things
And promises unkept Sometimes you win, sometimes you don't
That's how love goes
Sorrow runs deep, but the joy you will keep
That's how love goes
You get lost, you fall down, but still you find your way
That's how love goes
It goes where the wind blows Take what you want live the good life
Sounded good to me
So I rode that wave, I was once so sure
Now I don't know what I need
Giving only the best of me
So sure of my designs
I looked for the safest bet
But the odds changed all the time Sometimes you win, sometimes you don't
That's how love goes
You turn the page, you seem more your age
That's how love goes
You get lost, you fall down, but still you find your way
That's how love goes Some people run away to find a new life
Some are gonna do what it takes to get thru the night
Afraid of standing still
When that's the only way Sometimes you win, sometimes you don't
That's how love goes
Sorrow runs deep, but the joy you will keep
That's how love goes
You get lost, you fall down, but still you find your way
That's how love goes
It goes where the wind blows |
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| (no subject) |
[Oct. 18th, 2006|07:56 am] |
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Lastnight we had sex to 8 songs of portishead. :) shiver. |
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| (no subject) |
[Sep. 13th, 2006|06:47 pm] |
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i know what i want my tattoe to be oh shit. |
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| (no subject) |
[Sep. 13th, 2006|04:44 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | giggly and burpy | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | I love you ono by stereo total | ] |
I love you, ONO
Diamond ring, CHA CHA
Holiday sun, OPQ
Planet earth presents you
Big money,
Big system,
Big fame,
Big brother
I need you, ONO
Silver fox, CHA CHA
Swimming pool, ZAP ZAP
Planet earth presents you
Big money,
Big system,
Big fame,
Big brother
No no no no I don't need it
Perfect system I am fallin'
I want you, ONO
18 gold, CHA CHA
Wedding march BANG BANG
Planet earth presents you
Big money,
Big system,
Big fame,
Big brother
I love you, ONO
I need you, CHA CHA
I want you, OPQ
Planet earth presents you
Big money,
Big system
Big fame
Big brother
No no no no ... |
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| clandestine fashion |
[Sep. 13th, 2006|08:57 am] |
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We cant avoid them, so we charge head first blind and beautiful
Theres no way they can steal this feeling from us
The feeling of knowing we are gold
and our hands are glowing for the righteous causes and the right reasons
The only secret thats left is the one we are creating right now
The clandestine fashion we are building is slowly taking over their heads and feet.
We can cut our own nails, we can eat colourful things
We can dance to the original glam blast
We can play for hours, and then play for days
We are beautiful sugary youngsters
Theres nothing to stop us now
And if you dont fall in love now, we never will
We cant wait to adore this culture that we hate
This is the beginning
You are reading the letters, the words
This is for you in the springtime
The secret of you and I
Now
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tres_fly_girl's journal
